Alright Washing Machine, this is Getting Real Now

Another year, another dead washing machine. Well, maybe I shouldn’t say dead. Demonic possession or vindictive self-awareness may be more appropriate. For instance, it has decided that locking the lid while running is now optional most of the time. Yet, sometimes it will play mind games with me and lock the lid just before I go to check if it has actually done something and then unlock as soon as I have finished cursing it and the lives of its unborn children made from its recycled parts.

Primarily, it has decided that it has fulfilled its purpose by simply filling up with water after being fully loaded and then returning to washing machine dream world where it is being served martinis by other scantily clad household appliances. Do you know how annoying it is to wring out a load of soaking wet bath towels by hand?

The ultimate slap to the face came just before I went to bed last night. After it had been sitting idle for hours with the lid open, the machine decided that to openly mock me by actually starting the wash cycle on its own with the lid open. The wife immediately ordered that I pull the plug out of fear of it attempting to kill us in our sleep. She made a good point.

This was our third machine in just over three years; all three were made by different manufacturers since we swear off the previous manufacturer each time. Does anyone’s grandma have a working unit that she’s had since the invention of the washing machine that she no longer needs for whatever reason? Active dad would like the hook-up.

Unsolved Mystery

Speaking of unexpected household crises, Grayson (2) decided to provide us with another one last night. The wife, the older two kids, and I were sitting on the couch watching TV when we heard crashing, thrashing, and maniacal laughter coming from the upstairs bathroom. Sarah (the wife) asked if we should go check and see what was happening. Say what? We were watching the end of the season finale of American Ninja Warrior! No way was I getting off the couch just for some noise coming from the bathroom! Nevermind that I could just press pause on my remote control.

So, the final competitor had just finished his run (which was phenomenal) when Grayson comes barreling into the great room (family room). “I soaking wet!!! Oh… Oh… Please help me… I soaking wet!”

He wasn’t lying. He was drenched head to toe – clothes, hair, and all. Before I can tell him to be quiet and hold on a minute (we were right at the end!), Sarah gives me a look that said, yes you need to pause right now. Bummer. So, we all race up the stairs; Sarah and Alexis took the lead, while I was carrying Grayson at the rear. Why did I get to carry the wet kid?

Alexis (8) and Sarah (age omitted for personal safety) both froze in shock when the bathroom came into view. Oh yeah, it was that good. The entire bathroom floor from tub to hallway was flooded. There was water all over the walls, vanity, and toilet. The towels that had been hanging on the rack were soaking wet lying in the middle of the room.

So, we asked Grayson the obvious question, “What did you do?!?” He looked nervously back and forth between Sarah and me. His response? “I didn’t mean to!” That was about all we were able to get out of him (he is only two after all and we need some work on our interrogation skills). Neither the faucet in the sink or tub were on and the toilet lid was closed. The best we could figure was that he had turned on the sink faucet, kept filling a cup that was suspiciously sitting on the countertop, and then dumping/flinging the contents around the room and on himself. Though, he must have done it 100 times to get out that much water. This mystery may go down as unsolved.

Fitness (American Ninja Warrior Style)

Speaking of American Ninja Warrior – who else watches that show? I really had not noticed it before until Cameron (6) turned me on to it. The competitors’ upper body strength is truly mind-boggling. Truth be told, I don’t watch much television. Most of what I do watch is around home improvement, reality cooking shows, and some sports. I did genuinely enjoy this show and am blown away by the physical fitness required to complete the obstacle courses.

Staying on the fitness topic, I took Clare and Grayson back to the nature preserve today. I was proud of the little man. He walked an entire half mile before wanting to ride in the stroller. The preserve has a small series of inter-looping paths, so there are several intersections. I made it fun for him by having him choose our path at each intersection. Our trip did get shortened by the rain, but Grayson had already had his fill of walking at that point.

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A final, side note: Now that I’m getting this whole blogging thing figured out, I’ve added some additional tags to the older posts to help spread the word and reach other people that might enjoy the blog. Feel free to share my blog with others. Thanks to all those that are following! Any advice is welcome!

Until next time – Chris (active dad at home)

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4 thoughts on “Alright Washing Machine, this is Getting Real Now

  1. DarMom says:

    Random Grandma Observations: Please let me choose the washing machine this time, it takes an hour and a half to wash one load, you don’t need that many options. Next, I think Grayson and Clare are teaming up to take you down, I’m just saying. Lastly, my grandchildren are in good hands with their SAHD, you are doing a wonderful job and are still my favorite son-in-law.

  2. Linda LIndsey says:

    Chris,
    How brave are you to be an at home Dad. I think it is wonderful that you get this chance that so few dads get to have. Make the most of it those darling kiddos will grow up way too fast for you.
    I tell you I had a Sears Kenmore for more years than I can count. It was that beautiful avocado color that is now back in style. We then moved, I sold it (my loss) and I spent bucks for a top of the line Maytag…..BIG mistake BIG BIG mistake. So now I am back to a Sears brand washer and dryer and login it once again. Some things you just can’t change.
    Your Wise Old Aunt Linda

    • Thanks Linda. Our current washer is (was) a Maytag. That will be the last time we get one of those. Before that we had a Frigidaire, which redefined the term lemon. I’m happy you’ve joined my parenting adventures!

  3. Pam Corcoran says:

    Chris,
    Children and water will always throw a loop in the prime time schedule! Also, I feel your pain on the washing machine issue. We went up, down and sideways with washing machine issues for about four years. I thought I would be standing out on Illona Drive washing clothes with a hose and a rock! I finally pitched such a fit, and due to the fact my last washer was still under warranty, I had the company basically come and get it. The store where I purchased it, issued me a gift certificate, where I then purchased another washer. The latest one has been a Samsung, front loader, and has so far lasted almost 3 years. Fingers crossed! Sadly, our dryer bit the dust about a month ago, so we had to replace that! It never ends!
    Call the company and throw a fit. A big one.
    Pam

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